Well to sum up my first week of sleep training Pierce I think I will use one word. FAIL. HAHA! I knew it was going to be hard...but it was even harder than I was expecting. I knew it would be an adjustment for both of us, but I figured it would get easier as the week went on...but instead it became almost impossible. The first time I used the method it took about 25 minutes to put him to sleep which I was pretty encouraged about. But he woke up almost every hour that night and by 3am was not going to sleep without nursing. Well the next day he took about 25 minutes to go to sleep using the method so I thought...ok I can do this. Well he slept a little longer that night but when he woke up he was screaming at me for almost two hours. Rocking him was not comforting him, putting him in his crib was not working either. It was really stressful. That was basically the rest of the week for me. I was completely stressed and exhausted. He REALLY fought me on this method.
BUT the most frustrating (to me) part was Dan put him to sleep a couple of nights and it took him seriously 2 minutes to put him to sleep using the method. He did not fight him at all. Then we had planned for Dan to wake up with him during the weekend and put him back to sleep and wouldn't you know he slept through the night. UGH. What am I doing wrong??? So the bottom line is he can put himself to sleep...he just wont for me. I don't know why but that really upset me. It made me feel like I am doing everything wrong. But after talking to Dan and my Mom and MIL I felt a bit better. The reason he is fighting me is because I am very comforting to him and he doesn't want me to put him down. Dan does not have the same relationship with him right now so it is not as hard for Pierce to be put down by him. So after thinking about it and digesting it some more we decided not to push the sleep training to much right now. When Dan is home he is going to put him to sleep and get Pierce used to going to sleep without me. When/if (remember he is mr. inconsistent) Pierce wakes up at night I will nurse him and put him back to sleep because this is the easiest and fastest way for both of us to go back to sleep. Eventually we will have Dan wake up with him at night and put him to sleep and test to see if he is actually hungry or just wants the comfort momma brings him. We are very very slowly going to transition him out of rocking/nursing him to sleep. Apparently neither one of us is ready for a full on cold turkey approach.
It is hard to admit defeat. But right now I have to...we are not ready...well I guess I am not ready. Pierce is ready (for Dan) and Dan is ready...but I just cannot seem to fight and win this battle right now.
I am sick of second guessing myself. The weird thing is when I was a teacher or a nanny I didn't do this to myself. Of course I was conscientious and thoughtful about what I was doing with the children but I didn't over think EVERYTHING. But I do now that I am a parent. I would not have thought twice about rocking a 7 month old to sleep for bed/naps while I was nannying or in a childcare center so why am I so worried about it now??? In both a nanny setting and a classroom setting I remember rocking 15-18 month olds to sleep and not even blinking an eye about it. And yes they naturally grew out of being rocked and it was pretty fluid (and I am sure they are well adjusted loved children now)...why oh why am I second guessing it now with my sweet baby boy????
Anyway...can you tell I am torn about this subject. Did anyone ever tell you being a parent is hard? No...no one. Well let me be the first...LOL!
Before I wrap this jumbley blog post up we do have a victory...Pierce took a bottle this weekend!!! This is such great news! This means I can more easily get a break and Dan gets a chance to continue to bond and grow closer to him. And of course this is one step closer to eventually not needing momma at night time and possibly sleeping consistently through the night. You know what is so funny...he took the bottle and sucked it down like he had been doing it his whole life. I cannot figure this kid out. He is so not like Saffryn (or me) at all!
Until next time....
Aww!! I'm so sorry you're having a hard time with the sleep training. Does not sound fun at all. I'll have a lot to learn from you in the future :) Just remember that you are a WONDERFUL mom!! And YAY for Pierce finally taking a bottle...go Pierce!
ReplyDeletei think hadlie and pierce are two peas in a pod! im right there with you, i tried sleep training, it worked and then i didnt....THEN she started teething so, thats where we are at. hang in there...
ReplyDeleteit is so hard!! I hear what you are saying with second guessing yourself--you took the words right out of my mouth with not blinking an eye with other babies but with your own you (subconsciously) hear and are effected by what other babies are doing and when yours is not doing "by the book" or what your best friends baby is doing we think we are doing something wrong.
ReplyDeleteI still get up with Hollis 3 times a night. It is rough, but I don't stress about it anymore. It is just the stage we are at right now and I would not trade it for anything. And with this being my 2nd I know just how fast it goes so in a matter of months he will be such a big boy heading off to school.
You know I was talking about this just the other day--I taught (when i was going thru it) that potty training landrey was the hardest thing I had done so far in parenting, but now looking back and now that she is 100% potty trained I think to myself what in the world did I think that was so difficult, it really as not that bad. So i say that to mean, it will pass and even though it stinks right now, it will get better, right?!?!
HUGS!!! When I am up 3 times with my little dude I will be thinking of you!!
I totally hear you on second guessing yourself when it comes to your own kids! I didn't realize I would do that so much. In just these short two months, I've found myself doing it on even small, simple decisions. Oh, the journey of parenthood. :)
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